Fractions of the Whole
by San Hayashi
Summary: A series of one-shots based on Cloud and Tifa's relationship as well as the "family" they have formed. May include some action-oriented fights scenes later on. Rated T for possible language, violence, and mild sexual themes. Other characters will appear
1. Differ

**Author's Notes: **Hello reader! Welcome to my first fanfiction based on the world of Final Fantasy VII. I am by no means an expert on the Final Fantasy VII universe, but I hold a special place in my heart for Cloud, Tifa, and their family. This is not planned; there will be little connection between the following one-shots aside from characters. I am basing each chapter (and its title) after words found in a random word generator, my inspiration for each and every chapter. Please read, review, and enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Final Fantasy or its characters. They belong solely to Square Enix.

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**.Differ.**

I can't really say the exact moment I realized I loved her. I think, in truth, it was always there, stowed away in the deepest, darkest, quietest recesses of my heart, forced into silence by my utter lack of confidence as a child. She had been the pretty girl next door. And I was...not good enough for her.

I turn my head to looked at her, sleeping soundlessly beside me, her head resting on my outstretched arm. I admire her face for a few moments, commemorating every detail to memory. It has become a habit of some sort, studying her while she sleeps, curled up beside me, peacefully unaware. I have come to cherish these moments, where I am alone to think, but not really alone. She is still there, right beside me, like she has always been.

When we were children, she had been kind and patient and finally a friendship had formed between us. I remember so well that night our promise was made, quiet, bashful words uttered between two youths with so little knowledge of the real world, of the future that lay ahead of us. We had no way of knowing the turn our lives would take.

I had left to join SOLDIER, determined to become a man worthy of Tifa's affection. I had left to become stronger, so that my promise would not be as empty as it had sounded in my own ears. I had not meant it to sound so empty, but that lack of confidences I had in myself made it impossible. I knew I couldn't protect her, not for real. I had to become something first.

I guess, that's where we differ. Tifa had believed in me, from the very beginning, when I had thought of myself as worthless. To me, SOLDIER was the only option I had to be good enough. But, apparently, I had been good enough all along. Would things be different if I hadn't left?

I suck in my breath as Tifa stirs beside me, scooting closer and draping an arm over my bare chest. I hold my breath, wondering if she will wake, but she remains sleeping. I fold my extended arm upward, wrapping it around her shoulder. My hand finds a lock of her hair and I twirl it lightly in my fingers. She smells of lavender and soap and I inhale deeply the unmistakable scent of Tifa.

And suddenly, I am overwhelmed by the love I feel, by the admiration and dedication I feel for the woman wrapped in my arms. I can hardly believe, after all we've been through, that she is mine.

Again, that is where we differ. When I had told her the very thoughts I am thinking now, some time again, she had only laughed graciously and shook her head.

"I knew it all along," she had said, "that we would be together."

"But how?" I asked, desperate to know, to understand the internal workings of her mind.

She tapped her temple and grinned. "I just did. I clung to that promise that we made. The one on the well. You remember it, right?"

I nodded. "How could I...forget. It made me who I -- we -- are today."

"Then you should understand."

I wanted so much to tell her that I didn't understand, that maybe I _couldn't_ understand. But deep down, I knew that I had kept a hold on to the promise, if only to fulfill it one day.

And when I had been overcome, by grief, sorrow, hopelessness, she had been the one to rescue me. It is ironic, how different we are. And yet, it is those differences that forged the attraction, that forged the bond. That forged our lives and our destinies.

I allow my eyes to close, content in my contempations, content that all was right in the world, if only for a little while. I am lulled to sleep by the gentle, shallowing breathing of my sleeping wife.

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**Further notes:** Well, what did you think? I know, it was mostly contemplation, but I needed something good to start with. Please let me know. If people like this idea, then I'll keep going. I've already got a few things in mind. Until next time!

- San Hayashi


	2. Sheets

**Author's Notes:** Alright, here's the next one-shot! Longer than the last one and definitely less contemplation ;) Anyway, this chapter, along with all of the others, is based off of a word from a random generator. The word this time around is - obviously - sheets! I really liked the possibilities with this one, and I must admit I wrote this twice before I was somewhat satisfied. Anyway, please read and let me know what you think!

**Further Information: **This is set almost a year after Advent Children. It's from Tifa's P.O.V.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Final Fantasy or its characters. They belong solely to Square Enix.

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**.Sheets.**

I stack the clean dishes, one by one, in the dish rack beside the sink so they can dry. I hum a melodious tune quietly to myself, attempting to fill the silence. There is no sound, aside from the gentle droning of the fridge and the soft thumping of the washing machine upstairs. But the silence is not a bad thing, not the lonely silence I once experienced, when Cloud was away for days and the kids were at school. No, this silences is different. It's almost comforting.

_Seventh Heaven_ is empty of patrons today. The bar is closed, as it has been every Sunday for almost a year now. A wonderful, unforgettable year. A smile curves my lips as my mind wanders backwards in time. But not too far back.

I glance at the clock on the wall. It's still early, just before noon, and I set about making some lunch. I gather the items I'll need for grilled cheeses, Denzel's favorite lunch. Last week was Marlene's choice. Before starting, I fill the sink with warm water, plug it up, and set a package of meat in the water to defrost for dinner.

"Mom!" Marlene calls from the front door as her, Denzel, and Cloud step inside the bar. Marlene's been in the habit of calling me 'mom' for quite a while now, so I don't think much of it.

"Hey," I say with a smile for each of them. "Enjoy yourselves?"

Clouds meets my eyes for a moment, nodding his greeting, before turning and shutting the door behind them. "Fenrir's as clean as she can get."

"We scrubbed and scrubbed!" Marlene smiles. "We got off every speck of dirt."

"Yeah, and then Marlene decided she wanted to spray it down," Denzel begins and I know where he's going with this because his shirt and parts are still damp, "and then spray_ me_ down, too."

Marlene giggles at this. "You were all soapy anyway."

"Why didn't you spray Cloud, too?" I ask her, glancing sideways at Cloud to see his expression.

"I was too far back," he says simply, but a smile is tugging at the corner of his lips. "She couldn't reach me."

"Cloud ran away," Marlene says, grinning at the swordsman turned father-figure. "He was afraid I'd get his hair wet or something. Then he'd have to spend hours fixing it."

Cloud's face drops. Marlene giggles again; Denzel and I are quick to join in. It's amazing how sensitive he can be sometimes. Marlene is only kidding with him and it doesn't take long before he realizes this.

"Funny," he says, and actually attempts a smile, mostly for Marlene's sake, I think.

Denzel jumps up to the bar, peering behind me at the freshly made grilled cheeses. "Alright! Lunch time!" he says, grinning at me. "Thanks, Tifa!"

"You guys need to wash up first," I say, knowing their hands are probably filthy from the morning's activities.

Both kids nod and race one another up the stairs to the bathroom. Clouds walks over, leaning up against the bar on the opposite side of where I'm standing. I lean my elbows on the polished black counter top. They're cool beneath my exposed flesh and goosebumps speckle my arms.

We're both silent for a moment. Not an awkward silence, but calm, relaxed, satisfied silence. Cloud gently nudges an empty laundry basket sitting on the floor at his feet. "Enjoy your clearing?" he asks, glancing back at me.

"Immensely," I reply with a hint of sarcasm that I'm not sure he catches.

"What's for dinner?" he asks, but glances back at the sink to see the defrosting meat.

I answer him anyway. "Steaks."

He looks down at the laundry basket again. "I can cook steak."

I blink, momentarily unsure what he means before I chuckle. "Cloud Strife, are you offering to cook dinner tonight?"

He looks up, frowning at my reaction, as though he has never made the offer before. Truth be told, he has a few times, but those times are so random and scattered I can't help the surprise. "I can cook steak," he repeats. "You've been cleaning all day, it's only...fair."

I love the way he pauses before important words, so thoughtful about what he wants to say. I notice he's watching me expectantly, rubbing awkwardly at his neck, waiting for a reply to his not quite offer. I nod and stand up straight, walking around the bar and offer him a quick peck on the cheek to show my gratitude. "That would be wonderful actually, thank you," I say before heading upstairs to gather the last of the laundry.

"Welcome," I hear him whisper sheepishly under his breath before I'm out of earshot and up the stairs.

Just as I reach the top of the stairs, both Marlene and Denzel round the corner, almost running into me. "Wash your hands good?" I ask them.

"Of course!" Marlene says, holding up her hands to prove the point. They do indeed look clean.

"Okay." They dive down the stairs, eager for food. "After lunch, you need to strip the sheets from your beds so I can wash them," I call after them.

"Kay!" they both call up.

I reach the hall of our second floor apartment just as the thumping of the washing machine ends. I step into the laundry room, pulling the dripping wet clothes out and shoving them into the dryer, then pressing start. The dryer whirls to life.

I cross the hall, stopping at the door leading to Cloud's room. With a familiar motion, I turn the knob and step into his room. His room is tidy, but that's not hard to accomplish, considering how few things he has in it. Aside from the bed, there's a small dresser, a nigh stand with a lamp, and a chest in the corner. A few pictures hang from the walls, mostly from his favorite moments of the past year.

The room is bathed in light as the midday sun streaks in through the parted curtains. I step up next to the neatly made bed and pull the comforter back, to the foot of the bed. I bend down, removing the fitted sheet from the mattress and pull it towards me.

And I'm suddenly overwhelmed by the smell of Cloud. I unconsciously pull the sheets to my face, breathing in the scene that is unmistakably, irrevocably his. It fills me with a familiarity that is comforting, reassuring, and decidedly frightening. I hold them to me, almost hugging them.

What I wouldn't give to have that smell on _my_ sheets.

"Tifa?" Cloud says from behind me and I whirl around, still clutching his sheets to my face. He looks questioningly at me.

"I...uh..I was just getting them to wash," I explain, hurriedly bundling them up into a ball and hugging them tight to my stomach, which has unexpectedly fallen to the floor. "Who knows the last time they were washed?" I laugh dryly, trying to cover up my unexplainable behavior.

He frowns a moment, obviously thinking. I can see it so clearly in his mesmerizing eyes. Finally, his eyes clear and he offers me a simple smile, something much more common now than a year ago.

"Thank you, Tifa."

It's my turn to frown. I want to think he's thanking me for washing his sheets, but it's obviously more than that. His _eyes_ say this.

"For everything," he finally says, as if to clear up any confusion that I may have. With that, he turns around and strides from the room, out of sight.

And suddenly I'm the one left whispering, "welcome," under my breath.

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**Further Notes:** Well, that's it for this update! I had fun writing this. Light fluff ^^ I hope Tifa didn't seem to out of character at the end...or Cloud for that manner. Anyway, please review!


	3. Inevitable

**Author's Notes: **Okay, it's probably a good idea to note that I didn't actually like this at first. When I started writing, with the word _inevitable_ in mind, I did not set out to write this. This just sort of happened. I'm kind of concerned that Tifa's a little out of character, but then again, there's good reason (or so I think...)! Anyway, I apologize before hand if this seems a little off. Remember, this story sort of wrote itself. I don't think it's bad or anything! I actually like it more and more I read it. Well, anyway, I'll leave it up to you to tell me what you think.

**Further notes: **From Cloud's point of view. I'm honestly not sure of the time. It could be before AC, it could be after. Cloud doesn't make mention of Geostigma, but whatever. I'll leave it up to your imaginations.

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**.Inevitable.**

Being near her should be enough. To know she is safe, healthy, happy. To know that she smiles every day. To know that _I_ am the causes of so many of those smiles. But deep down, the longing I have for her is almost beyond my control. How long will I be able to hold it back?

"Cloud?" Tifa says to catch my attention. She's asked me something and I haven't heard it at all.

"Sorry, Teef," I mumble an apology.

"Are you alright?" she asks, the concern evident in her voice, in the darkness of her eyes. I could get lost in them.

"I'm fine," I assure, standing up from the counter where we're going over the bills for_ Seventh Heaven _and Strife Delivery Services. "I just need...to think, that's all." I can feel her eyes on me as I leave the bar and head outside into the chilly night air of Edge. I pull the door shut quietly behind me, not wanting to wake Marlene and Denzel asleep on the second floor.

I walk down the first couple of steps leading up the the bar and take a seat. The cement stairs are cold beneath me, but I ignore them. I don't know how long I sit here, staring off into the distance, my gaze disrupted by the nearby buildings. But I don't really see them. I see Tifa's face before me, full of concern and understanding.

A moment later I hear the door behind me open and close. If my hearing was not beyond that of a normal human, I might not have noticed. Tifa stands behind me, not coming closer, but not going away either. I'm not sure whether to be glad or annoyed. I want to be alone right now, but how can I push her away? Again?

"It's getting cold," she finally says, stepping up beside me. I glance up at her. She's staring ahead, bare arms crossed over her chest.

"You should go back in," I tell her.

"When will you be in?" she asks, finally looking down at me. I meet her eyes, which probably isn't the best idea. She smiles sadly at me and nods. "That's what I thought," she says before sitting down beside me on the stair. She shivers at the contact with the cold stairs. I react instantly, putting an arm over her shoulder and pulling her into me for warmth.

I suddenly wish I hadn't when she snuggles up against my shoulder. The closeness is almost too much to bear. I swallow. "Thanks," she whispers, but most of it is carried away on the cold air.

"Don't mention it," I say, glad that I can do this for her, that I can keep her warm. And safe. And maybe happy.

We're silent for some time, staring ahead of us, lost in our own thoughts. I have the sudden urge to know every thought passing through Tifa's mind, to get inside her head.

"What are you thinking about?" she says suddenly, shifting her head so she can look up into my face. Apparently she is thinking the same thing I am which gives me a moment of satisfaction.

"You," I say, clenching my jaw against the word, waiting for her reaction. I shouldn't have said that.

"Funny," she says, "I was thinking about you, too. What were you thinking about exactly?"

So many things. I open my mouth to say something, but the right words aren't there. I don't understand why I can't put my feelings into words. Instead, I pull my arm back and I stand up. "I have deliveries in the morning; I should get some sleep."

This obviously isn't what she wants to hear from the look on her face. She stands though, nodding. "You're right, of course. So sorry to keep you up. And I shouldn't be out here without a jacket."

She brushes past me and I feel a chill that isn't caused by the weather. She opens the door and goes inside, leaving it open for me, but walks into the darkness of the bar. I glance behind me at the city once more before stepping back inside and walking towards the bar.

Tifa is at the bar and I see her rummaging in the cabinets beneath it. She pulls out a bottle of whisky and sets it down before grabbing two shot glasses. I stop on the bar's other side, watching her cautiously. She fills both glasses to the brim and looks at me expectantly before downing hers in an instant. "Just a drink before bed."

"What's wrong?" I ask her instantly, not bothering to touch the other glass. I've never seen her like this, her mood so suddenly shifting.

When it's obvious I'm not going to drink, she reaches over and takes the other glass, downing it just as fast before grabbing the whiskey and refilling both glasses. I watch as she finishes her third and reaches for the forth. I instantly put a hand over it and she glares. "Let me have it if you're not going to drink it."

"No," I say, pushing it just out of her reach beside me. "What's wrong?"

She scoffs at me for a moment before turning away and pouring yet another shot. I snatch the bottle away as she downs her forth glass. Too much. She may run a bar, but Tifa doesn't have a habit of getting drunk, and I know this is going to effect her pretty quickly.

"I don't understand," she finally says, her words not as slurred as I would have thought. I wait patiently for her to expound on these words. She tinkers with the glass in her hand, holding it at different angles and catching it in the dull light overhead. "I don't understand how you can be so insensitive."

I frown. Was I being insensitive? "I'm sorry." An automatic response.

She shakes her head. "Don't say that. Don't_ lie_ like that. An empty sorry is as hurtful as an insult, Cloud. Don't say it if you don't mean it."

"I'm so-" I cut myself off, suddenly lost for the right words. What do you say to someone who doesn't want to hear an apology? I'm so very tempted to just walk away. But my feet stay rooted where they are. I can't leave her, not like this. No amount of meaningful apology would fix it later.

"What do you want to hear?" I ask her.

She doesn't move, stands completely still. "I want to hear how you feel."

I blink, my breath caught in my throat. Feel? About what? "I feel tired...and confused. I don't know what's going on with you."

She laughs to herself, shaking her head. "Great. Now ask me how I feel."

I don't want to play games. Not now. But it's too late. I've already started. "How do...you feel, Tifa?"

She turns, and I can suddenly see the hurt in her eyes, the pain that is there, that I've somehow caused. I want to take her into my arms, to sooth that pain, to fend off the ghosts that are haunting her. Whatever I've done, I want to make it right. Somehow. I want to be the hero that I was never able to be before. But my feet don't cooperate and I stand still.

Tifa sighs, gently setting the shot glass on the bar and shaking her head. "It doesn't matter. Good night, Cloud," she says, walking past and up the stairs to her room.

I watch her disappear into the darkness._ Go after her!_ my mind screams. I finally set the whiskey bottle down and look at the still full shot glass beside me. I pick it up and put it to my lips. Just as I am about to tip it into my mouth, I pull it back, shake my head, and dump it back into the bottle. I set both glasses in the sink and replace the whiskey bottle.

I head upstairs. Tifa's door is shut and there is muffled sobs coming from the other side. I approach her door, my fist hoovering there, ready to knock. But I'm frozen. What's going on? This isn't like Tifa at all. Concern envelops me and I knock lightly on the door. I'm not used to dealing with these kind of issues. I'm not the comforter, I'm the comforted. No answer, just the soft cries. I hesitate a moment before opening the door and stepping into Tifa's room.

It's pitch black. If not for my Mako enhanced eyes, I would not have seen her there, sitting on the edge of her bed, knees drawn up to her chest and head resting between her knees. Her shoulders are shaking and the cries are louder now that I'm in her room.

"Tifa," I begin.

"Go away, Cloud," she says, her words muffled by her knees.

I want to. I want to turn right around and leave, to forget about all of it. To fall asleep and wake in the morning to all of this being over. But it's not that simple. And I can't leave her. "No."

"Please?" she almost begs me.

"I want to help. I want to make it...right. Whatever I did, I want to fix it." I step towards her, one hesitant step at a time, drawing closer and closer to her until I am standing beside the bed, close enough to touch her. But I don't. I remain still, waiting.

She looks at me and her eyes are filled with tears. My heart breaks. She stands then, launching herself at me, her arms around my middle, face buried in my chest. I am like stone, stiffening beneath her. She cries against me and my arms raise to encompass her, to hold and steady her.

"Why Cloud, why?" she demands, drawing away enough to look up at me, hands clutching at the collar of my shirt, tugging me. "Why can't you ever just say what I want you to say? Why can't you just tell me those three simple words I've been waiting my whole life to hear? Why can't you? Why?" By this time she's beating on my chest with her fists. I wince against them, each blow harder than the last.

"Tifa, stop this," I say, reaching up and taking hold of each wrist. "This isn't you talking. It's the whisky."

She struggles against me for a moment before stopping, looking up at me between her imprisoned hands. "Yeah, that's it, it's just the alcohol talking. Not me, not my inner most feelings. Damn you, Cloud," she whispers the last part under her breath. "And I guess this is the whiskey talking, too?"

Before I can even ask, she leans up on her tippy toes and our lips collide. I'm too stunned to really react. They are so soft, so unbelievably soft and smooth and delicious. But the scent of alcohol on her breath is enough to stop me from returning the kiss.

"Tifa," I say against her lips.

"Just shut up and kiss me, Cloud," she says, pulling her arms away from me and wrapping them around my neck. "I'm mostly sober and I've wanted to do this a long time."

I don't deny it. And it's impossible for me not to kiss her back. Our lips move together, first a bit awkwardly, but then in smooth, knowing motions as though our lips knew one another so very well. I close my eyes, inhaling her, breathing her in. Maybe he's drunk and she'll forget about this all in the morning. Or maybe - and a large part of me wishes this is so - these are Tifa's real feelings.

We pull away, both out of breath. I look away awkwardly, not sure what to do next.

"Thank you," Tifa says, pulling away, no longer sounding like she's crying. I turn my head to meet her eyes. "I'm sorry for being a jerk."

"It was only inevitable," I tell her, trying to smile. I'm not sure it works quite the way I hope it will. Every muscle in my body is twitching with the realization that I just kissed Tifa Lockhart. "But I forgive you."

She smiles at this and I see my Tifa returning. "I'm...really tired." She leans forward, brushing her lips against mine in a quick, chaste kiss. "Good night, Cloud."

"Good night, Tifa."

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**End notes: **Okay, so, what did you think? Tifa wasn't too ooc, right? I know she's really strong, and I respect Tifa's character a lot (she's my favorite, after all), but everyone has a break down every once in a while, right? I think with all she's been through, it was _inevitable. _Cloud may have that affect, lol. Anyway, please read and review! I would like some feedback, please, kthnx.

~San Hayashi

**Extra note:** A big thank you to my loyal reviews! Qwi-Xux, Kitsune13, NailoSyanodel, and my newest review, vx-Luna-xv! I really appreciate it =D


	4. Sigh

**Author's Note:** So, I know it's been a little longer for this update than usual, sorry about that. I've been real busy with school. However, Spring Break started for me this week and I've been playing through Final Fantasy X like crazy (for the fifth time...). Seriously, non-stop for three days! Anyway, here's the next installment! It's really rather short, I know, but I promise more next time. Something good xD

**Further notes: **Tifa's point of view. I think I'm going to try and alternate it like I have been, just for the added challenge. The word this time, obviously, is sigh.

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**.Sigh.**

"Can I ge' sa' service in this place?"

I turn away from the stove, with a silent sigh as the irritated - and slurred - voice of a customer reaches my ears. The man at the bar looks like he's had far too much to drink, but he pushes his empty mug in my direction anyway, determined to have more.

"Sir, I think you've had enough for one evening," I say, taking the mug and setting it behind the bar out of sight.

"I'll sa' when I've ha' anuff," he declares stubbornly, reaching for the glass as I move it out of sight, too slow to grab it.

"Sir, I'm asking you nicely. Once more, and you're out of here," I warn, my tone suddenly hard. Drunk customers were always so hard to communicate with.

This one seems to catch the hint, however, and shrugs, tossing some Gil onto the table before stumbling out of the bar. I scoops up the Gil and put it into the register before turning back to the stove with a sigh of relief.

The rest of the evening fairs better. Marlene and Denzel are able to help after they finish their homework and things go smoothly with their help until bedtime. After that, I am able to handle the few left over customers without much difficulty. I close the bar at eleven thirty, turning on the CLOSED sign and locking the doors.

I set the bar stools on the bar and the chairs on the table so I can give the floor a quick mop. Finished with that, I take care of what dishes I hadn't been able to finish near the end of the night, wiping down counters and putting away the alcohol and left over food.

Once finished, I head upstairs to the small living room, plopping down on the worn down cough with a sigh of exhausted contentment. I turn on the television, flipping through the channels for nothing in particular. I am hoping to tire my eyes out enough to help me fall asleep later.

I hear the unmistakable roar of Fenrir's engine pulling up to the bar, followed by the sound of keys and then foot steps. I remain where I am, not surprised when Cloud appears in the doorway. He doesn't say anything at first, just stands there, watching me.

"I'm home," he finally says, stepping into the room and walking around the couch to take a seat beside me. He sighs, too, as he sits, but it is purely from exhaustion.

"Welcome home, Cloud," I reply, smiling at him sleepily and leaning in to give him a peck on the cheek.

He smiles tiredly at this. He leans his head back against the cough and props his feet up on the coffee table, folding his arms in his lap. It's my turn to watch him. He doesn't move, just breaths regularly, chest falling and rising slowly. After a few minutes, I'm almost convinced he's asleep until his arm raises lazily to wrap around my shoulder and pull me onto his chest.

I rest the side of my head against his chest and close my eyes, secure in his arms. I hear him sigh again, but I can't tell what sort of sigh it is. I raise my head to look at him. "You alright?"

He nods, one eye opening to look at me. "I just had a really long day. Too many monsters on the road, too many packages in my care."

I understand and lay my head back down. People sigh for many reasons, out of longing, contentment, frustration, annoyance, surrender...the list goes on and on. Sighs are far more expressive than most people seem to realize. As I think about these things, Cloud runs his hand through my hair. It's so relaxing, I start to feel myself drift off to sleep.

"Maybe we should go to bed?" I ask, my voice heavy with sleep.

He chuckles at this. "I'm far too tired to move."

"Me too," I agree and snuggle up against him, getting as comfortable as possible. We'll probably end up going to bed later, but for now, we are comfortable like this.

Cloud sighs again, and it is that last, relaxed sigh before falling asleep with the one you love. I emulate the sound before allowing sleep to grip me completely as well.

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**End Note:** Yeah, I know, all that time and this is the best I could come up with. Review anyway, please! It's the inspiration that fuels the mind of champions! (or something cheesy like that, lol). And, if there are some spelling errors...well...that's not my strong suit and the spellchecker is being odd for me. So sorry in advance.

**Extra Note - The Thank Yous:** Thanks to my reviewers: scienceguy, Qwi-Xux, NailoSynodel, and vx-Luna-xv (Pretty much the regulars ;D)


	5. Milage

**Author's Notes:** Okay...I know, I know, I've really neglected this. I apologize to readers who have been waiting. I've been really busy working on a series of original novels with my stepmom; that's been coming along really well. I took out some time to write this because I needed to take a break.

**Further Notes:** This is from Cloud's point of view. I always enjoy trying to get into his head. I know this is short, and very...well...drabble-ish, but that's what these are, right? Anyway, let me know what you think!

* * *

**.Milage.**

I just kept running. My back was always to my family and friends, my feet always carrying me away from them. I can't even begin to count the miles I crossed to distance myself from them. And as I think back on it, I realize it was because I was afraid. Afraid of commitment, afraid of love. Because in the end, I knew I'd just turn and run again.

That's where the idea for Strife Delivery Service started. Sure, I knew it would benefit a lot of people, and it would bring in an income of sorts, but in truth, I just wanted to get away. And I wanted a good excuse to do it.

I was selfish. I didn't think how it would effect Tifa, how it would effect Marlene, and later Denzel. I just loved the feel of the wind blowing through my hair, the hum of Fenrir beneath me. Whenever they entered my thoughts, I'd push them aside and hammer the throttle, determined to increase the distance that separated us.

But that didn't work for long. I cared about them too much. I'd come back for longer periods of time, finding deliveries closer to home. Until Geostigma, that is. My inner fears and sins festered within me, finally breaking through as a deadly disease that would slowly eat me alive. How could I face my family like that? How could I be anything more than a burden to them in such a state?

And the miles piled on. I took on more jobs than ever before, returned to Seventh Heaven less and less. Then stopped returning at all. It was easier for me to go to Aerith's church, dwelling on the past, than it was to go home.

My phone rings and I reach into my pocket, pulling it out. Tifa's name is highlighted on the screen. I smile to myself, flipping it open. "Strife Delivery Service. What can I deliver for you?"

Tifa giggles into my ear. "I'd like you to deliver one chocobo-headed hero, A.S.A.P."

I try to keep my tone neutral and professional, but a chuckle escapes anyway. "That sounds like a rather pricey deliver, ma'am. Are you sure you can cover the cost?"

"Oh, I think I can more than cover it. But for clarity's sake, what's your asking price?"

"Well, you're in luck actually. This is a limited time offer, only good until this evening. I'll let you decide the price."

I can imagine the grin that's spread across her face at my words. "How about I keep the bed warm for you and we'll work out a price together."

"Sounds like the deal of a lifetime. I'll be home soon." I flip the phone shut and slid it back into my pocket.

I had been stupid. I wasn't thinking. I had distanced myself from the only people who mattered to me, who cared about me. It took a long, long time before I realized that. But Tifa tells me is isn't the mistakes I made that are important, it's the way I make up for them. With this thought foremoest in my mind, I revv Fenrir's engine and zoom down the long, dusty road towards home counting the miles until I reach home.

* * *

**End Notes: **I'm pathetic, right? All that time and this is what I have done. Don't hate me...and leave a review!


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